You will not be able to hurt T-Rex until the third time he pops his head. This is good practice for dodging the metal objects that fall. After he backs out of the room and the gun powder box falls, aim for the box. Hold your fire until you see his head. Then shoot, and dodge the metal pieces. Repeat this until T-Rex is defeated.

Escaping Spinosaurus rampage (stage 1 and 8)

In Stage 1, he is the second dinosaur that you see. It is very hard to escape unhurt during the short run in stage 1. However, you can stay alive no matter what, unless you stop while he is chasing you. In Stage 8, he is farther away and you can easily run away without being hurt. However, this run is very long and the Spinosaurus is not the only thing that can hurt you. When he gets stuck at the boxes he will start throwing them at you. There are also holes which you must jump and Blue Raptors which you must avoid. The easiest way to do all of this is to run straight through the middle. The only thing you will have to do is jump the holes. Do not stop running, even to defeat the Blue Raptors when Spinosaurus is stuck.

Defeating Dilopholsauruses (stage 2 and 8)

Run towards the Dilopolsauruses and get close to them. Then, turn around and run across the water. When you see a Dilopholsaurus in the water, shoot at the switch so it gets electrocuted. It takes three electrocutions to take a Dilopholsaurus down. Do this repeatedly until you defeated all the Dilopholsauruses.

Defeating Blue Raptor (stage 5 and 8)

The Blue Raptor is found in the one way museum tour, two rooms through the tour. When you find him, run into the next room. Position yourself so that the Blue Raptor is under the shadow. When he is in position, shoot the switch and a Modeled Pteranadon will fall on him. After he gets up, run into the next room and immediately get behind the exhibit in the middle. Start pushing it quickly. It will fall on him. Repeat either the falling Pteranadon or the exhibit case actions one more time to defeat him.

Defeating Red Raptor (stage 5 and 8)

The Red Raptor is found at the start of stage 5 and around the middle of stage 8. In both stages, there is a room with Raptor model(s), a cage, and a switch. In stage 5, you have to lure the Red Raptor in by investigating one of the models and the switch. Once he is in the room, lure him under the shadow. When he is under the shadow, shoot at the switch. He will be trapped. He will angrily jump around the cage, but cannot escape. In stage 5, he will knock down some keys.

Defeating the Giant Pteranadon (stage 6)

There are three platforms with one box on each platform. Immediately stand in front of a box. When the Giant Ptereanadon appears, jump away from the box so that it explodes. If you do this too early, the box will not explode. It usually takes three to five direct hits for the Giant Pteranadon to run away.

Defeating Compys (stage 7 and 8)

When you enter the area where you have to fight the Compys, three boulders will fall -- one blocking the entrance, one blocking the exit and one in the middle. When all the Compys appear, lure them in front of the middle boulder. Use the Tranquilizer to paralyze them in front of the middle boulder. Then, use the Flare Gun to shoot the boulder so it runs over all the Compys in its way. The boulder will return each time. Repeat this until all the Compys have been defeated.

Back To Game Boy Advance Index

A lawyer got married to a woman who had previously been married 12 times.

On their wedding night, they settled into the bridal suite at their hotel and the bride said to her new room, "Please, promise to be gentle. I am still a virgin."

This puzzled the groom, since after 12 marriages, he thought that at least one of her husbands would have been able to perform. He asked his new bride to explain the phenomenon.

She responded:

My first husband was an IBM Sales Representative who spent the entire marriage telling me, in grandiose terms, how great it was going to be, but never delivered.

My second husband was from Software Services; he was never quite sure how it was supposed to function, but he promised he would send me documentation.

My third husband was from Field Services and repeatedly said that everything was diagnostically OK, but couldn't get the system up.

My fourth husband was from Educational Services, and you know the old saying - 'Those who CAN, DO; those who can't, teach.'

My fifth husband was from the Telemarketing Department. He knew he had the order, but he wasn't quite sure when he was going to be able to deliver.

My sixth husband was an Engineer. He told me that he understood the basic process but needed three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

My seventh husband was from Finance and administration. He knew how, but he just wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

My eighth husband was from Standards and Regulations, and he told me that he met the minimum standards but regulations weren't clear on how to do it.

My ninth husband was a Marketing Manager. Even though he had the product, he just wasn't sure how to position it.

My tenth husband was a psychiatrist. All he ever wanted to do was talk about it.

My eleventh husband was a gynecologist, and all he ever wanted to do was look at it.

My twelfth husband was a stamp collector, and all he ever wanted to do was collect stamps."

- God I miss him!

So now I've married you, and I'm really excited."

"Why is that," asked the lawyer.

"Well, it should be obvious! You're a lawyer!! I just know I'm going to really get screwed this time!"